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Module 3

Rewriting Your Patterns and Breaking Bad
Repetitive Habits

LESSON 6: It All Comes Down To This



In this lesson, we explore the baseline, final layer of your automatic patterns: The fear layer. In this lesson, you can see that your partner's patterned behavior is just their way of expressing fear and that your own reaction to their behavior is just your way of expressing fear. Seeing you partner and yourself this way can soften the patterns and allow them to loosen up and unwind themselves.

How might you treat a frightened child that you love? That is the same way that you could treat your partner when they are doing their pattern and the same way that you could treat yourself when you are doing your pattern.


Find the root of all patterned behavior 
Realize that no pattern is "better" or "healthier" than any other pattern                                                            
Design a new way of handling fear in your partner
Design a new way of handling fear within yourself


“The shadow is not a problem to be solved or an enemy to be conquered, but a fertile field to be cultivated. When we dig our hands into its rich soil, we will discover the potent seeds of the people we most desire to be."

- Debbie Ford

REFLECTION QUESTION  | Answer the question(s) below

What are your deepest fears about love, relationship and intimacy?  Consider the shape your pattern might take if there was something else at the root?

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