1 | Welcome To Evolving Love (6:00) |
1 | Set Yourself Up For Success (3:00) |
1 | What Is Evolving Love (10:29) |
1 | Your First Big Insight (5:03) |
1 | QUIZ: What Did You Learn In Module 1? |
1 | Why We Do What We Know Is Bad For The Relationship? (5:46) |
1 | Innies and Outies (Repressive & Reactive Patterns) (3:07) |
1 | Unhealthy Behaviors That We Can Stop (4:49) |
1 | Who's Pulling The Strings (5:57) |
1 | Freedom From The Victim Story (7:36) |
1 | It All Comes Down To This (1:33) |
1 | Unwinding Your Patterns (You Can Do It!) (13:05) |
1 | How To Make Good Habits Stick (5:57) |
1 | Knowing Yourself (And Your Partner) Completely (4:40) |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 3? |
1 | No More Complaining And Defensiveness For Us (7:42) |
1 | Resolve Your Conflicts Permanently (3:47) |
1 | 3 Mistakes People Make When Using This Process (7:07) |
1 | DEMO: Bryan And Jennifer's (Real) Conflict (11:53) |
1 | DEMO: Bryan Sees Jennifer's Perfection (9:00) |
1 | DEMO: Jennifer Sees Bryan's Perfection (11:41) |
1 | DEMO: Bryan Shares A Future Vision Of Jennifer (16:05) |
1 | DEMO: Jennifer Shares A Future Vision Of Bryan (7:26) |
1 | Lightning Fast Conflict Resolution For Couples (5:34) |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 4? |
1 | STEP 1: Which Conflict Would You Like To Resove Most? (4:19) |
1 | STEP 2: Writing Exercise - Finding Your Partner's Present Perfection |
1 | STEP 3: Get Ready To Be Your Best Self (2:32) |
1 | STEP 4: Practice Open Generous Listening (4:32) |
1 | STEP 5: See Your Partner's Perfection (3:09) |
1 | STEP 6: Transforming Your Complaints Into A Positive Vision For The Future (17:41) |
1 | STEP 7: Sharing Your Best Future Vision (5:24) |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 5? |
for Conflict
1 | Breakthrough #1 - Defining Yourself Is Limiting Yourself |
1 | Breakthrough #2 - It's Not Supposed To Be Hard Work |
1 | Breakthrough #3 - You Might Be Making The Wrong Lists |
1 | Breakthrough #4 - Commitment Isn't What You Think It Is |
1 | Breakthrough #5 - All Your Parts Deserve Love |
1 | Breakthrough #6 - You Can't Measure Love |
1 | Breakthrough #7 - Bad Isn't Always Bad |
1 | Breakthrough #8 - Focusing On Happiness Doesn't Make You Happy |
1 | Breakthrough #9 - How To Really Love An Inner Child |
1 | Breakthrough #10 - Which Way Should You Be Facing? |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 7? |
to Extraordinary Love
1 | Breakthrough #1 - Defining Yourself Is Limiting Yourself |
1 | Breakthrough #2 - It's Not Supposed To Be Hard Work |
1 | Breakthrough #3 - You Might Be Making The Wrong Lists |
1 | Breakthrough #4 - Commitment Isn't What You Think It Is |
1 | Breakthrough #5 - All Your Parts Deserve Love |
1 | Breakthrough #6 - You Can't Measure Love |
1 | Breakthrough #7 - Bad Isn't Always Bad |
1 | Breakthrough #8 - Focusing On Happiness Doesn't Make You Happy |
1 | Breakthrough #9 - How To Really Love An Inner Child |
1 | Breakthrough #10 - Which Way Should You Be Facing? |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 7? |
1 | The Deepest Reason To Be Together (12:17) |
1 | The 2 Mistakes People Make When Co-Creating A Future Vision (1:34) |
1 | Good Examples Of A Common Purpose (And Some Bad Ones Too) (3:14) |
1 | Who Gets Their Way (And Why) (2:19)? |
1 | Example Of A Relationship Purpose (3rd Pole) At Work (7:46) |
1 | Defining And Communicating Your Relationship's Purpose (19:21) |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 9? |
1 | Daily Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - The First Light Practice (5:52) |
1 | Daily Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - The Checkin Practice (7:57) |
1 | Daily Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Think Three Times Practice (4:57) |
1 | Daily Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Be Nice To Your Imaginary Friend Practice (3:15) |
1 | Daily Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Attraction Gardening Practice (4:02) |
1 | Weekly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Energy Exchange (8:46) |
1 | Weekly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Bring New Creativity Practice (4:14) |
1 | Monthly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - The Consideration Exchange Practice (11:15) |
1 | Monthly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - The Undefended Request for Feedback Practice (12:50) |
1 | Yearly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Renewing Your Vows Practice (5:24) |
1 | Yearly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - Shifting Your Narrative Practice (4:27) |
1 | What Did You Learn In Module 10? |
1 | Yearly Practices For An Extraordinary Relationship - A Special Invication For You |
Module 6
There's More Than One Reason for Conflict
LESSON 3: The Universal Patterns That All Couples Fall Into
RESOURCES
LESSON DESCRIPTION
In this lesson, we explore the second layer of conflict (-3), Universal Polarities and Energy Patterns.
There is a basic physics principle: Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Keeping this in mind can help you understand Universal Polarities because they always come in pairs. If someone is acting "defensive", then there is an equal and opposite "attack" somewhere else in the relationship. If someone is dominant than someone else is likely to be submissive.
Understanding this layer can help us see how our own unconscious behaviors actually *create* some of the behavior in our partners that is most problematic for us.
When we practice the same responses over and over for a lifetime, they form familiar "energy patterns" in our bodies. These energy patterns have very predictable ways of interacting with each other. In this lesson, you'll learn about how they interact and begin to see that a lot of your conflicts are not even personal to you, and are truly universal and experienced by everyone with similar polarities and energy patterns! That's a great first step toward being able to choose differently.
Share in the comments below which of Kessler’s energy patterns feels most predominant when you are dealing with intense interactions?
WHAT YOU'LL LEARN
“Emotional Maturity means that your awareness operates even during the most profound emotional states."
- Richard Rudd
REFLECTION QUESTION | Answer the question(s) below
Recognizing this layer: Which of the 5 survival energy patterns feels most predominant? The leaving pattern, the merging pattern, the enduring pattern, the aggressive pattern, the rigid pattern?
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